Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
