Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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