we're blogging at a bar
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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