this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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