He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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