After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
ttyl tear gas
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
