You just made me feel so damn special
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
