turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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