That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
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