Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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