would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
