So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
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Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
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I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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