Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
