I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
she told me i tasted like america
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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