Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.

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  (847): I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july. http://tfl.nu/a19z
  Replies (20) Good night (5993) Bad night (666)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.

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  (770): i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles. http://tfl.nu/d3lp
  Replies (7) Good night (2994) Bad night (1296)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals

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  (843): they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals http://tfl.nu/7ny2
  Replies (21) Good night (4039) Bad night (920)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.

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  (352): Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song. http://tfl.nu/qyok
  Replies (22) Good night (3487) Bad night (3488)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?

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  (727): he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal? http://tfl.nu/v8vs
  Replies (8) Good night (3702) Bad night (1326)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?

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  (618): Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth? http://tfl.nu/eljh
  Replies (9) Good night (1062) Bad night (5434)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.

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  (772): A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm. http://tfl.nu/ew0u
  Replies (3) Good night (1086) Bad night (1529)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  That was an excessively violent trivia night

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  (604): That was an excessively violent trivia night http://tfl.nu/kztc
  Replies (4) Good night (1760) Bad night (655)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years

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  (425): we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years http://tfl.nu/w11g
  Replies (2) Good night (1257) Bad night (611)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.

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  (516): Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy. http://tfl.nu/8uc8
  Replies (10) Good night (1074) Bad night (556)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin

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  (312): If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin http://tfl.nu/83ln
  Replies (9) Good night (741) Bad night (1102)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick

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  (651): Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick http://tfl.nu/7fc7
  Replies (11) Good night (793) Bad night (829)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.

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  (303): Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super. http://tfl.nu/a5le
  Replies (1) Good night (608) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is

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  (780): I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is http://tfl.nu/n0jt
  Replies (6) Good night (401) Bad night (817)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...

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  (775): He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow... http://tfl.nu/4bbw
  Replies (1) Good night (338) Bad night (262)

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