I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
