here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
