just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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