OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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