Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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