I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I just wanna be euthanized
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I need water and some morals
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.