I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
