i wish there were pregnant emoticons
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
