oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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