I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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