He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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