idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize