i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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