How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize