This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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