It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize