"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Drunk is not a location!
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize