If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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