Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
