Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
she peed on how many people?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
