the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize