Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
What drink are we having for lunch?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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