I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize