i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
