i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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