Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
