its not stalking. its research.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
