D3 body, D1 cock
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
she peed on how many people?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize