im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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