Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
