I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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