So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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