how can u be prego again
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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