dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
You need Xanax blowdarts
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
