Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
