i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
