Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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