I molested 6 butterflies tonight
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
