a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize